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Wednesday, November 21, 2007

20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

  • At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

  • Page yourself over the Intercom. Don't try to disguise your voice.

  • Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

  • Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "In."

  • Put Decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has got over their caffeine addictions, switch to Espresso.

  • In the memo field of all your cheques, write 'For smuggling diamonds.'

  • Finish all your sentences with 'In accordance with the prophecy.'

  • Don t use any punctuation

  • As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

  • Order a 'Diet Water' whenever you go out to eat with a serious face.

  • Specify that your Drive-through order is 'To Go.'

  • Sing along at the Opera

  • Go to a Poetry Recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme

  • Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

  • Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

  • Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, 'Rock Bottom.'

  • When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I Won!, I Won!"

  • When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the car park yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!!

  • Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we're going to have to let one of you go.

  • And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity --- share this with someone else to make them SMILE!

It's Called! Therapy!

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